Five Struggles You’ll Face as a Female Professional (And How to Face Them)
In honor of International Women’s Day today, I wanted to shed some light on some of the issues that women face while advancing their career, in any industry. I have faced many of these struggles myself, but I wasn’t always so sure how to deal with them.
Whether you’re a fellow female or nonbinary professional that faces these struggles, or a male professional that is looking to support more of your fellow coworkers, here are just a few of the struggles women face in the workplace, and how to deal with them.
1. The “double bind”.
In a 2019 interview with the New York Times, Katherine Phillips discusses the “double bind” that working women face:
If they’re perceived as nice and warm and nurturing, as they’re expected to be, they don’t show what it takes to move into a leadership position. But when they take charge to get things done, they’re often seen as angrier or more aggressive than men. It’s like a tightrope women are asked to walk: Veer just a bit one way or the other, and they may fall off.
Although the double bind appears in other aspects of a woman’s career, such as asking for a raise (more on that below), this specific example rings true in leadership. It starts at a young age, too. Young girls that are assertive are seen as “bossy”, while young boys that display the same behaviors are seen as “future leaders”. The result is that female leaders are either seen as competent or likeable, but never both.
How to deal: Be an advocate for other women’s advancement in their own careers. Speak up against words or phrases in the workplace that bolster the bias. In my personal opinion, things like “she’s so emotional” or “she’s very abrasive” require responses like “By ‘emotional’ you must mean ‘passionate’” or “I think ‘assertive’ is a better word.” Also, make sure to celebrate the successes of other women in the workplace. Build (or find) a strong community of women that actively advocate for each other!
2. Experiencing burnout.
“Burnout” is a syndrome related to a lack of motivation and feelings of hopelessness. It’s linked to work-related stress by the World Health Organization (WHO).
Although men work more hours each week on average, women are actually more likely to experience burnout. This is in part due to the frustration that comes from being less likely to be given positions of power.
Burnout can have some damaging effects not only on a woman’s mental health, but also her career. With more women experiencing this syndrome, this means there are more women that choose to change careers and start all over, making it even more difficult to advance their career.
How to deal: Practice self-care and other stress-management activities to prevent bringing work home as much as possible—at least the bad parts. Prioritize yourself in your free time whenever you can.
At the same time, it’s important to recognize when enough is enough. Sharpen your skills and start looking for new opportunities with employers that celebrate women and provide a better work-life balance.
3. Being paid less money for the same work.
Not only are women still getting passed up for promotions more than men, they are still being paid less than their male counterparts that do the same work. It’s 2020 and studies still show that the gender wage gap is still a very real thing, but why?
The answer lies in the double bind we talked about earlier. When negotiating salary, women that ask for more experience social consequences. Less people are willing to be on their team. This doesn’t ring true for men, and it’s why many women just accept what they’re offered rather than negotiating a higher salary.
How to deal: Ask. For. The. Raise. Supporting yourself and knowing your worth is so much more important than being accepted by biased coworkers. Along the same vein, be sure you’re not also practicing this bias; encourage and advocate for your female counterparts that negotiate better pay. As women, we need to work together and do what we can to shrink the gender pay gap.
4. Not having a female mentor.
One thing I regret when I began my career in marketing was not looking for a female mentor sooner. With more men in power than women, it can be tricky to find a strong female mentor that knows you and your goals and will push you to reach them. Although there is nothing wrong with having a mentor in your career who is male, it can be challenging for men to fully understand the struggles that you face as a woman.
How to deal: Freda Lewis-Hall, Executive Vice President and Chief Medical Officer of Pfizer, advises building a “board of directors” for your career. Here is what this board consists of:
Mentors - who “know your heart” and can give you advice not just in your career, but in your personal life too.
Coaches - who “help you close specific gaps” in your skillset.
Sponsors - who will “put their name on the line for you” and advocate for you for new opportunities.
Role Models - who you may not have ever met, but still choose to emulate.
Prioritize networking with other female professionals—both within and outside of your industry—to build this “board of directors”. These roles can be filled by both men and women, and don’t need to be filled by those who “rank” higher than you in your career either!
5. Guilt about your work-life balance and having a family.
Women are still largely seen as caretakers in the household. Sure, we are typically more nurturing than men, but that doesn’t mean we should feel so guilty about working just as many hours (or less hours) than men do!
Men still experience guilt when they’re at work and away from their families or children, but our society doesn’t feed into this guilt with men the way they do with women. Women today are still asked to essentially choose between being a mom or having a successful career, and it doesn’t help that the US has one of the worst maternity leave policies in the world (with a grand total of zero weeks of paid maternity leave).
How to deal: Samantha Walravens, author of Torn: True Stories of Kids, Career & the Conflict of Modern Motherhood, provides some tips in an article for Johnson & Johnson: Set clear boundaries between work and home, and make sure to communicate with your boss or your partner at home if you need help with something. Keep in mind that any time you’re prioritizing the needs of your family, there is no need to feel guilty. Also, don’t compare yourself to other women that you might think are “superwoman”. Instead, cheer her on and support her.
Sometimes the hardest part of dealing with these struggles is thinking you’re alone in fighting these battles. Keep in mind that other women and nonbinary professionals across the country deal with these issues every day. Seek out support from these other professionals by going to female-focused networking events and building a support system. You don’t have to face these issues alone!